i'm disappointed in myself,
as of now, because im sitting in front of the computer instead of studying Geog.
i have decided to do lit. and file all my stories for Grapevine.
(like finally!!!)

This is not good.
I'm just glad that i have TLL later.
I miss my friends there a lot somehow.
i don't know why,
but i keep wondering how i'm going to walk out the room with my head high on my last day.
The day is approaching, faster and faster,
sooner and sooner.

Good God,
i need to control myself, and my emotions and everything about me.
If not, perhaps the people around would just leave me,
but after all, this is a dog-eat-dog world,
anything can happen.

I'm going to keep a distance,
and just be everyone's best friend.
Call me a phony or fake,
but that is how it works.

I don't belong anywhere,
because my sense of belonging to someone or something,
was gone long before i had even started loving.

Nevertheless, i'll continue to spread the love,
by providing a shoulder for others to lean on.
I'm not going to think for myself anymore,
i'm going to think for others,
and give them all i've got.

I'm tired of being selfish,
I'm tired of clinging on to everyone.
I'm tired of trying to get people to talk to me.
I'm tired of just trying to be me.

I'm a thousand faces.
Full Stop.